Why Sex Hurts Sometimes (and How to Make It Stop)

Of course, women tend to associate sex with a variety of positive feelings: fun, happiness, and love. Unfortunately, for some women, sex can also be associated with discomfort or even pain. Some women may even try to hide or mask the pain because they fear it can be interpreted as a lack of enthusiasm, excitement, or affection for their partner. In fact, pain during or after sex is a common issue for many women and can be caused by multiple factors.

Pain associated with sex “doesn’t necessarily mean anything is wrong, but it’s clearly not as right as it should be.”

So how do we improve things under the covers? We can start by understanding why this discomfort may be occurring.

“If you’re trying to have intercourse when you’re not aroused, lack of lubrication can cause friction and lead to pain. Even if you are aroused, decreased lubrication caused by hormonal deficiencies (such as atrophic vaginitis, which can occur when estrogen levels are low after menopause or while breastfeeding) can lead to pain.

There are other, more common reasons, too. “Some other common causes of pain during intercourse include gynecologic conditions such as

* Vulvar vestibulitis is an innflammation of the vestibular glands at the vaginal opening.

* Vaginismus is involuntary contractions of the vaginal muscles that may make intercourse impossible.

* Vulvodynia is a non-specific vulvar pain, which is often experienced as an intense burning feeling.

While most women experience pain during or after sexual intercourse so often, it doesn’t necessarily have to become a fact of life. There are several remedies that can prove to be very effective.

Inadequate lubrication can be remedied with sexual lubricants, such as KY Jelly. Some alternative non-medical treatments that can be taken to prevent or sooth friction during intercourse include:

* Using natural lubricants like coconut oil or olive oil (coconut oil should be used with caution, as it can break down condoms).

· Taking sitz baths to relieve discomfort after sex ( sitting in a bowl of warm water and salt).

· Trying different sexual positions.

Since it takes two to tango, there are also important steps one’s sexual partner can take to alleviate discomfort during intercourse. Asking your partner to experiment with a few new methods if perfectly acceptable and could actually turn out to enhance the experience for both parties!

While the methods mentioned here may help (and I hope they do!), some more serious causes of pain during sex could warrant the attention of your gynecologist.

“If you lack lubrication because of hormonal reasons, vaginal estrogen, when used appropriately is life-saving and safe, but you’ll need a prescription, so ask your gynecologist.

If you’re suffering from other conditions, such as vulvar vestibulitis, vaginismus, or vulvodynia see your doctor. These conditions can be treated with things like Xylocaine jelly, antihistamines, vaginal dilators, pelvic physical therapy, and other options. Just remember, nobody should have to suffer during sex. It’s supposed to be fun!”

As most women can attest, anything out of the ordinary occurring ‘down there’ is alarming and can produce anxiety – still, it can be extremely difficult to overcome shyness or embarrassment one may feel over discussing this subject, even with a medical professional.

Any recurring pain during sex should be investigated by a gynecologist. Sex is not supposed to hurt, and there’s almost always a way to improve things. So don’t be afraid to ask for help!



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